Say Goodbye, Say Hello

I've always wondered when it would be easy to simply just say 'goodbye' to someone, knowing I'll probably never see them again and I'll probably do a horrible job of staying in touch with them. I feel like 'goodbyes' have been a part of my life for a long time. I'm not talking about death. That's more of a 'see ya later' phrase for me. So why, after all these years, do I still find it hard to say goodbye? Staying in touch has become much easier over the years, through wonderful technology such as 'Facebook' and e-mail. I guess I've struggled with the personal staying-in-touch because there are just too many people I love out there and it would literally take all day, everyday, to call or visit old friends that I consider dear to me. Is the friendship not worth it? Of course it is, but at some point I have to live my current life today and not always drag the past with me. I'm always excited to begin a new adventure with Ben, even if it is extremely frustrating to be in the dark about the where/when for years at times. It's not easy and it's not something I would recommend people to willingly do. It's really hard actually. It's not the romantic ideal of traveling and seeing the world. It's more of constant culture adjustment, constant putting yourself out there to meet brand new people, constant feeling like an idiot, constant living in the 'what's next' phase. There are perks of course, we do get to see the world and become submersed in new cultures. We get to travel to our back yard to places people spend their lives planning a single trip. The traveling part does become easier. We've traveled so much now, I'm comfortable traveling alone, to places I cannot speak the language, realizing that if I get completely lost or miss my flight or have to hitch-hike, that it's all going to be fine. I find myself literally feeling God with me, feeling like I have a constant friend there, leading me to where I'm supposed to be. At least that's one friend I don't have to say 'goodbye' to. I guess it's more selfish reasons for me. I often have to say 'goodbye' to friends because of choices we made, not because they're going anywhere. I secretly wish it were the reverse at times. I know I have to be vulnerable again, in a new place, struggling to just make it through the market, all the while these old friends are remaining consistent in their lives. Funny how sometimes the grass is always greener on the other side. Either way, I'm always eternally grateful for the relationships that form, even if it's just someone to say 'hello' to. I wouldn't change the blessing of new friendships for anything. Find a 'newbie' in your world to say 'hello' to, ask them their name and remember it, it will mean more than you know...

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